Neglected Count: 2 - 2 Coin
Mission Ad:
- The frontier town of Meadowcrest reports raids by Goblinoid invaders. They request urgent assistance for the defense of the settlement.
Meadowcrest is a colony populated by a tough group of Arcanian settlers to the Southwest of Lake Arcania.
The party takes the Rail System to the Meadowcrest Station.
- Conductor Richard Blacktrack checks the passes of the party.
- Korarath places a mobile order for a charged lemonade and Drogath gets a Fairmont white cheddar mac and cheese.
- Doodledip visits the casino car and spots Reynold. Doodledip sits down at Reynold’s table and places a large bet of 2 Coin, promptly winning. Reynold silently leaves, likely angered by Doodledip stealing all the luck. In his rush to leave, he left behind his bag. Doodledip catches up with him and informs him about the bag. Reynold implies that it was not a mistake, and after retrieving it, gives Doodledip a mischievous wink.
Meadowcrest looks halfway between an impoverished shantytown and a wild west ghost town, with pale green fields and rolling hills in every direction. One measly little creek meanders through the town, providing a pleasant bubbling ambiance. But it does little to stop the stifling heat of the hot sun beating down.
The One Hundred and One Throngdors notice a town square, saloon, ranch, and general store. There’s a boarding house directly next to the Station.
- Upon entering the boarding house, they meet a bald Dwarvish lady with a red braided beard. Doodledip introduces the party and their purpose. She informs them that just this morning, some of the Goblinoid raiders were captured and locked up in the Town Square as hostages. The party books a room. It is dusty. Looking out their window, they see a beautiful vista of rolling hills.
- Entering the town center, the party finds three small Goblins in a cage.
- Before they can approach the cage, they are cut off by the Human mayor, Haru Bollister.
- Korarath explains who they are and that they are there on a mission for the Guild.
- Haru appraises the party, chewing with a smirk. “So, this is who they sent, huh? Yeah, you guys will fit right in here. Well, anyway, you can go on back to Lake Arcania, we don’t need you, the situation has been handled now.”
- Drogath speaks up. “Is handling it putting kids in cages?”
- “Look, we had some scuffles, some people got hurt, but they won’t do shit now that we could retaliate against the hostages.”
- “You’d hurt them?”
- “We won’t, but they don’t know that.”
- Drogath asks if they have tried talking to the Goblin raiders, but Haru says that they’re not interested in conversation, they’re only interested in attacking the town. Drogath figures there’s more to the story.
- Doodledip and Korarath inquire about the town’s founding. Haru asserts that when they settled the land almost a year ago, it was empty.
- Haru becomes insulted when Urrakka seems unfamiliar with the Bollister Family, and aggressively mentions that he’s surprised that Orcs would keep an orphan alive.
- The party decided to approach the kids. When they don’t raise their sniffly gaze, Drogath tries to interest them in Shroomy Snacks and macaroni and cheese.
- The youngest curiously accepts the offering, providing a Puffflower in return.
- Following suit, Korarath offers her charged lemonade, which the middle kid takes and swallows in one go.
- The youngest’s name is Yhupp. He says he doesn’t know where his parents are. Before the conversation goes too far, the oldest, Yhipp, puts Yhupp behind him and takes over. “We haven’t seen our parents since we got captured this morning. I mean, we haven’t seen them since we left last night. We were tryna, you know…”
- “Tryna what?”
- “Make a difference, I guess?”
- “Make a difference?”
- “Yeah. Our parents get… attacked.”
- “So you were trying to help your parents?”
- “Yeah.”
- “What were your parents trying to do?”
- “Collect from the stream. It’s pretty muddy now, but there used to be so many Puffflowers, all along the banks.”
- It becomes clear that the environment has been disturbed due to Meadowcrest construction projects. This environment is vital for the production of Puffflowers and Cranefish, which the Goblins gather.
- The party considers how difficult it would be to bust open the cage, and confirms that the children are physically unharmed.
- The party agrees that they are solidly on the side of the Goblins and intend to break out the kids overnight.
- In the meantime, they head to the General Store and browse its goods.
- The party approaches the Puffcreek. There’s a dammed-up area with reduced flow, and the surrounding banks are a muddy mess, with wood and metal strewn about. There’s one water wheel leaning heavily to the side, and little sign of life aside from clouds of biting flies.
- Upon investigation, it’s clear that the structures are likely in disrepair due to intentional damage. There are tracks in the mud where a scuffle happened, and some smaller goblin tracks were dragged by some larger tracks.
- The party heads to the saloon.
- Drogath orders a cider and pours the complementary dish of peanuts into his bag.
- Korarath asks the barkeep whether any raid action has happened nearby. The barkeep responds that the raids normally center on the Puffcreek, with only the occasional arrow or torch landing inside the walls.
- Urrakka, in lieu of a dry apple wine, orders a double whiskey. Attempting to throw it back in one gulp, she starts choking. The barkeep rolls his eyes, places a water in front of her, and walks way.
- Urrakka throws a peanut at the back of his head. He turns around and says “You’re gonna leave now.”
- The party now arrives at the ranch.
- Here there’s a strapping young Human lad, shirt off, glistening in the sun while pitchforking some haybales. Behind him are a number of stables.
- Urrakka inquires about whether they’ve experienced any Goblin raids recently.
- “Heh, no. No Goblins here. They stay away from our horses.”
- “Why do you value your horses?”
- “Because they’re our livelihood and they’re beautiful beasts! If you’re lookin’ for Goblins though, I saw some locked up in the town square. Perrrty funny.”
- The party mutters to each other about how they don’t like it in this town.
- “So you want a horse, or?”
- Doodledip asks what’s the name of tall brown horse.
- “That’s Chestnut Butt!”
- “What about that one, that white horse?”
- “That’s Ghost.”
- “What about that gray one over there?”
- “That’s Wolf. Wolfbiter, I like to call him, got chompers on ‘im!”
- The party decides they want Wolfbiter.
- Drogath asks, “Do you love these horses?”
- “With my whole heart.”
- Drogath mulls over the ethics of stealing a beloved horse from a racist.
- Urrakka asks what the lad’s name is. He’s Nathanael, and he settled here with the rest of the town about 10 months ago. The party inquires about how Haru came to power. Nathanael informs them that Haru ran for mayor unopposed after organizing the settlement of Meadowcrest.
- Drogath asks “Why don’t you run for mayor, Nathanael?”
- “I like the horses. That’s my whole thing.”
- “If you run the town, you can get more horses.”
- “You’re telling me that there’s horses in politics?”
- “It’s mostly horses!” says Korarath.
- “So, you’re telling me, that if I do politics, I get horses. To have, and to hold… to cherish?”
- “They pay you a salary that you can exchange for horses.”
- “Really!?! This is the first I’m hearing about this. We could get so many more horses…”
- Drogath pulls out a pad of paper and drafts a petition to elect Nathanael as mayor. The party signs it, and then Nathanael puts down his name in big, blocky letters. The N is backwards, but strangely, only the first one.
- As the party walks away, Urrakka throws a peanut at the back of his head. He does not notice.
- Urrakka inquires about whether they’ve experienced any Goblin raids recently.
- Here there’s a strapping young Human lad, shirt off, glistening in the sun while pitchforking some haybales. Behind him are a number of stables.
- The party returns to the boarding house and secure Wolfbiter, putting some Shroomy Snacks in his trough.
An alarm goes off in the dark town, and the party exit the boarding house to investigate.
- People are grabbing guns and rushing to Meadowcrest’s fortifications.
- Korarath grabs someone and asks what’s happening.
- “They’re here!”
- “The Goblins?”
- “Yeah. Probably.”
- “Probably?”
- “Someone’s here! They’re all around! Open your eyes, people, the end times are nigh!”
- Up on the ridgeline of the distant hills, glowing torchlight can be easily detected in the dark. Because of the way that the lights are bobbing methodically, it can be intuited that the carriers of the torches are likely on horseback. There’s probably about 50 of them.
- Korarath grabs someone and asks what’s happening.
- Doodledip proposes riding Wolfbiter out to meet the Goblins and inquire about their intentions.
The party then decides to approach the Goblins on foot.
- Drogath throws Doodledip in a perfect spiral, is an impressive but inefficient way to gain ground.
- Doodledip blows his whistle to call the Goblins, but they do not approach.
- Urrakka recently worked on her linguistics skills, and knows that Goblins utilize a complex hand signaling system for communication. However, the party is in the dark without a light source. Korarath returns to the cage, and finds Yhipp, Yhapp, and Yhupp asleep in a pile with a guard watching over them nearby holding a musket. She retrieves her flint and steel.
- The Goblins are continuing to circle, their lights bobbing in the distance. Some short cries are heard from their direction.
- The party makes their way quickly towards them, making their presence openly known. When they are close, they can see more details. It’s clear now that the Goblins are mounted on donkeys and seemed equipped for battle with spears and slings. They are about four to five feet tall. One trots forward, silhouetted, with a few more flanking them, and demands that the party drops their weapons. When they cooperate, the Goblins move forward and begin to lash together the wrists of the party members. Urrakka, thinking quickly, signs a universal indication of peace towards the Goblin who seems to be in charge. The Goblins acknowledge it, and forgoing the bondage, allow the party to mount the donkeys alongside them, stowing their weapons.
- The Goblins are experienced riders, and it takes effort to balance and hold on tight. About ten of the riders move off with the party into the darkness, the remaining forty or so staying on the outskirts of Meadowcrest.
- Urrakka is sharing a large gray donkey with the commanding Goblin, a comparatively tall and dark forest green individual named Gintz. She has unkempt pale pink hair falling over large plates of colorfully beaded and patterned armor. She’s got a long spear with a sharpened black rock at its point.
- Urrakka initiates a conversation. Gintz is under the impression that the party has the authority to represent the town in negotiations with the Goblin leader, which is where they are headed. Urrakka clarifies that the party is related to Meadowcrest only tangentially at best, being only visitors, but they intend to secure the safety of the Goblin children at least.
- After a short while, the group begins to see many lights off in the distance. There’s lanterns, torches, and braziers casting bouncing shadows on what looks like an impressive compound of giant yurts. There’s canvas, support ropes, and scaffolding all along the outside, where there numbers dozens of lookout posts from which the party detects little Goblin faces peering out. The riders are hand signaling to the lookouts, who in return are rapidly writing down reports and fastening them to ropes that guide them as they slide down deeper into the compound, becoming quickly hidden in the masses of tented structures. There’s a thin, sky-blue Goblin in the group who has been doing the majority of the complex signaling.
- As the group enters the compound of The Goblin Clan, the party is astonished to find what appears to be an entire permanent city inside. There’s tall spires, a tower above, and what looks to be wooden and plaster buildings abounding. As they are guided through the streets, they see many Goblins peering out from windows and alleyways, having signaled conversations at each other from across the street. The party arrives at what appears to be a royal residence.
- Gintz warns the party to show proper respect and be quiet until spoken to. All of the other Goblins depart, and Gintz leads the party into the residence, where a throne room is waiting to receive them. The throne is situated in the middle of the room, about 20 feet away. Behind the throne are several hooded figures, at least six to seven feet tall. They’re hunched over yet hulking, much larger than any Goblins yet seen. Only their hands are visible, and they’re yellow and orange instead of green and blue. Korarath and Doodledip recognize that these might be Hobgoblins, who are typically larger, stronger, and more mystical than the average Goblin, leading to a respected status in Goblinoid culture and prevalently serving in shamanic roles. Korarath excitedly passes on the information to Drogath, excited that she remembered something from Goliath history class.
- After a moment, a side door opens. In strides a tall, skinny, lime green Goblin, wearing something resembling a regal tracksuit and designer puffy jacket. He’s got chains with big medallions around his neck, and a tastefully medium-sized crown which sits upon long ears that stick out to the side. He sits on the throne and looks down at the party, seemingly disgusted. He appears to already be bored with these visitors, and annoyed at his responsibility to be present.
- Some court musicians pluck a tune:
- He rubs his chin, glaring at the group for a while before starting in:
- “Okay, first of all, I’ve been executing people who annoyed me all morning. My body count right now is like, eighteen, no cap. So you better think reaalllllllll smart about what you’re about to say. You do not want to piss me off, alright? Don’t give me any of that. Now you. What’s your name?”
- He points at Doodledip.
- “I’m Doodledip.”
- “What’d you say? Biller? All right, uh Biller, you like myyyyy crown?”
This inside joke would work a lot better if Bizzle was there instead to be Biller, oops.)
The regal Goblin’s spiel is interrupted by a a servant announcing from the side of the room, “Now entering, Queen Claag!”
- The Goblin on the throne jumps up, losing his composure a bit. “Shit, I thought I had another minute… All right, whatever. The name is Prince Herb, don’t forget it!” And he sprints out of the room, through a side exit.
- Gintz has kneeled down. Korarath and Drogath notice and mimic her, nudging Doodledip and Urrakka to follow.
- In enters a short, lime green Goblin wearing a very bright and stylish pantsuit. She’s got exceptionally long ears, adorned with a number of dangly earrings.
- She walks over with poise and perches on the arm of the throne. “Please, rise, Gintz, I’ve received your report, good job once again.” She then addresses the four party members.
- “I understand that you say you can help us get back our children that have been taken from us.”
- Drogath responds, “They’re in a cage and we can just bust open that cage, we’ve already been in town, they won’t stop us.”
- “I worry about the large number of firearms in the town, do you think that you can do this while hidden? And why do you want to do this in the first place? Why should we trust you?”
- “Oh, I’m tight with Yhipp, Yhapp, and Yhupp.”
- “You’re tight with Yhipp, Yhapp, and Yhupp?”
- “Yeah. My boys.”
- “And when did you meet them?”
- “Oh, today. I gave them mac and cheese.”
- Korarath pitches in, “And I gave them my charged lemonade.”
- “I’m not familiar with these… these items. These are foods?”
- Drogath affirms this.
- Korarath says “Charged lemonade is more like an elixir… of energy.”
- “I see, well, thank you for looking out for them after meeting them so recently.”
- The party and Queen Claag confer about possible rescue plans. They consider causing some soft of diversion or magical distraction to draw away the armed guards to ensure that the rescue is successful and nonviolent. Queen Claag confirms with the shamans behind her that they would be able to create some sort of twister to draw away the Meadowcrest folks’ attention.
- Queen Claag then openly worries that armed conflict will be inevitable nevertheless, following the rescue. She explains that her people are migratory, and depend upon the Seasonal lifecycle of the Puffcreek for their Spring gathering of Puffflower Greens and Cranefish. The encroachment of Meadowcrest over the past months has resulted a limited ability to perform this vital gathering. The destruction of the natural state of the Puffcreek has caused great struggle and rationing in the compound. They tried to convince Meadowcrest that this region was theirs, but because they were migrating elsewhere when Meadowcrest was founded, the settlers are under the impression that it was free to claim. This is when The Goblins began sabotaging the construction that in turn reduces the natural abundance of the Puffcreek.
- Queen Claag is ashamed that she was unaware that Yhipp, Yhapp, and Yhupp were attempting to take matters into their own hands and succeed where their elders had failed. Her immediate priority is in their rescue, but her overarching priority is in securing the permanent safety of her people.
- The party says that they doubt they can convince the Meadowcrest settlers to leave entirely, but they are attempting to install new management with a kinder, or at least simpler, heart, who might be better to negotiate with.
- Drogath inquires whether The Goblins have seen a wild gray horse with a penchant for biting. While he asks the question, it dawns on him that Wolfbiter looks a lot like an especially large donkey that the Goblin warriors ride, and in fact was the very steed of Gintz that Urrakka shared. It seems that Wolfbiter was in fact a lost donkey that only was reclaimed that evening when it broke loose from the party.
- After more discussion, the party decides to attempt to install Nathanael as Meadowcrest’s leader with a horse-first platform and come to a peaceful agreement with The Goblins. If this is unsuccessful, The Goblins will be going forward with the plan to create the magical diversion and rescue Yhipp, Yhapp, and Yhupp.
- As the party exits the royal residence and heads out of the compound, news of the meeting rapidly flies past them with hand signals. A large Goblin family awaits them at the exit, and asks, “Is it true? Are you really going to help our kids?”
- “Of course, yes. Yes.”
- “Please give them their teddy so they know things will be okay.”
- The party is also provided with their confiscated weapons.
By the time the party returns to Meadowcrest, things have calmed down a bit. The remaining Goblin warriors are camped out on the ridgelines surrounding the town, and the armed people on Meadowcrest’s battlements are using a shift system, waiting for the impending conflict.
- Because of how hectic things were when the party slipped away, it’s unclear whether they were spotted joining The Goblins.
- The party leaves the teddy and some more snacks with the caged Goblin children. Haru spots the party and walks up, suspiciously interrogating them. It’s clear that he suspects that the party is somehow in cahoots with The Goblins, but he has no evidence.
The party begins drumming up support for Nathanael’s campaign. They need four pages of signatures in order to trigger a special election, and the first page was already completed yesterday.
- Korarath begins accosting people outside the general store to ask if they’re registered to vote and talking up Nathanael. She begins to say that he’s smart, but Drogath recommends that they focus on handsome and kind, which are easier traits to sell. She’s able to acquire a page of signatures from the passersby.
- Meanwhile, Doodledip heads to the boarding house, and almost forgets that he’s already met the manager, leading to an awkward start of the conversation, but then he steers successfully towards investing in tourism and attracting horse-riding visitors to Meadowcrest, which convinces her to sign the petition and allow him to visit the other guests to collect signatures.
- Urrakka returns to the saloon and notices that the peanut bowls are gone now. She makes small talk with the bartender. “How has business been for you since you started here?”
- The bartender invokes a Famous Toosehn Saying, “Well, everybody’s got dry lips, right?”
- “Fantastic. What if I were to help make the lips in here wetter than this town’s ever seen?”
- “Well, you got me listening.”
- “All right. Um, how about I throw a burlesque show in support of our new candidate for mayor?”
- After providing some entertainment, Urrakka is able to get a page of signatures in support of Nathanael from the saloon’s patrons. Haru watches from the entrance, suspicious, and not at all distracted by Urrakka’s feminine wiles. The party shortly discusses the ethics of ousting the town’s first gay mayor.
Having secured four pages of signatures, the party heads to see Nathanael at the stables. He’s lounging on a hay bale with a cold lemonade, long brown hair swept over his soldiers, six pack glistening with sweat. They show him the pages of signatures and convince him that the town admires him enough to elect him mayor in Haru’s place.
- “You guys just roll in here on day and change things up the next day. You guys got a real style about you. By the way, where’s my horse?”
- The party informs Nathanael that Wolfbiter is hurt and he has to follow them to tend to it. They mount up on some of the other horses and ride out of Meadowcrest towards the encamped Goblins. As they ride, Drogath begins providing Nathanael with the information they’ve come to learn about The Goblins and the situation. He seems very interested in how The Goblins also love their donkeys, or as he puts it, “the weird little ones that kind of look like Wolfbiter.” He also likes the Cranefish and is sad that they went away. He seems to quite like the idea of being the guy who brings the fish back and gets to share in the bounty of horses and donkeys.
- Some Goblins break off from the camp and ride alongside the party until they return to The Goblin Clan compound. Here, Nathanael and Queen Claag meet.
- “He’s glistening.”
- “Yeah, he does that.”
- Queen Claag does not seem convinced that Nathanael has what it takes to be a strong leader, and requests to speak with him privately.
- After a short while, Queen Claag returns and says that they have worked out an amenable understanding, provided that the transfer of power goes smoothly. She offers to send her second in command Fursch with a bouquet of flowers to signal to the residents of Meadowcrest that peace with The Goblins is possible.
Upon returning to Meadowcrest, the party strides right into the mayor’s office in the town square. It shares the space with a town hall meeting room, sheriff’s office, and one small jail cell.
- Korarath addresses Haru. “Haru, you failed your people. The people of this town want new leadership. And we got this petition that four pages worth of people have signed. Saying that they want Nathanael as their new mayor.”
- “Yeah, I heard about your little petition. Alright, so when’s the duel gonna be?”
- “Between…?”
- “Between Nathanael and myself? That’s the law here.”
- ”… checks out. What kind of weapon do you have?”
- “Shootin’ irons.”
- Nathanael speaks up, “Guys, I don’t like violence.”
- “That’s why you should be the mayor!” says Drogath.
- Korarath volunteers to stand in Nathanael’s place.
- “Aight, your fur’nal!” scoffs Haru.
- “What did you say?”
- “Your fur’nal.”
- “Did you call her fertile?” asks Urrakka.
- “Youuurrr furnerallll.”
- “Ohhhhhhh…”
- Drogath says, “You have a funny accent, man.”
- “That’s rude.”
- “You’ve done a lot of rude things. So let’s not go name calling.”
- “It’s rudeee. Set up a civilization, put all your hard work into it… Alright, noon it is.”
The party realizes they have no gun for the duel, and heads to the general store. Korarath gets off to a pretty rough start with the shop owner, and eventually reaches the point.
- “I’m not asking you to get involved in politics, I’m just asking you to donate a gun to our cause.”
- “It sounds like you’re starting an assassination attempt!”
- “No, it’s just a good old-fashioned duel!”
- “Oh, alright, I love duels.”
- Korarath selects a musket and places it in her quiver.
- The shop keeper confirms the duel details and sets about spinning up some merch to sell.
Shortly before noon, Korarath casts some magical protection on herself. The duel is about to begin.
- The shopkeeper has quickly set up a stand of customized duel merch and it’s all selling like hotcakes. Drogath buys a Team Nathanael hat and a Team Nathanael lollipop. The hat’s shoddy stitching is already falling off. Korarath gets a sticker for her quiver. Doodledip purchases a hat that says “Nathanael 20”. Noticeably, the first N is backwards on these too, leading the party to think that it’s an intentional and consistent style choice.
- Korarath, having never shot a firearm before, is very nervous. However, her spirit holds and she confirms that she knows how to use it by firing into the dirt.
- Urrakka wanders off to purchase a Belgian Waffle at the local Waffle Brothel House.
- Doodledip, Drogath, and Urrakka try to hype up the crowd with a dance in support of Korarath and Nathanael, however, Doodledip is too short to be seen and the resulting formation looks uncoordinated.
- Haru preps his firearm and takes his position.
- The duel is first to death or surrender.
- Korarath and Haru take their positions, walk ten paces, and turn.
- Korarath fires first, hitting Haru in the shoulder. He goes down, still holding his gun up, shaking.
- Haru yells, “Son of a bitch!”
- “Are you ready to give up yet?”
- “You think that blubbering fool can do better? We can’t make the hard decisions I can!”
- “I think he’s going to be the best damn mayor this town’s ever had!”
- Haru unsteadily raises his gun, and the shot whizzes over Korarath’s head. He begins reloading. Korarath follows his example. Haru is fumbling, the wound in his shoulder giving him a lot of trouble. Korarath is experiencing a lot of adrenaline as well, and throws up a bit in her mouth.
- The crows is silent aside from the party’s cheers of support. Things have gotten real.
- Korarath’s second shot misses. Haru’s hits Korarath, but she’s able to turn slightly at the last second and catch it in a non-vital area.
- Drogath feigns a trip and fall, attempting to stealthily kiss Korarath’s outstretched foot to impart magical healing. The heal is successful, but the stealth was an obvious failure. It becomes clear to everyone present that Drogath just directly interfered with the duel. Drogath stands up and tries to brush it off like it was purposeful, announcing that he wants an end to the violence and he believes in the town and Nathanael. Nobody in the crowd is convinced, but nobody moves forward to apprehend Drogath either.
- Korarath begins reloading again, but Haru passes out. Korarath promptly declares that Haru surrendered, and Nathanael has won the contest.
- Doodledip looks around at the crowd. Nobody is obviously emotionally moved, they just seem uncertain about what to do now.
- Drogath pushes Nathanael to make a speech about peace with The Goblins. “Guys, I’m so excited to be your mayor. It’s going to be so cool. Horses everywhere. Also, I don’t think it’s cool that we’re fighting The Goblins. This is Fursch, we’re homies now, and yeah I mean if you guys are cool with me being mayor then I think we could be chill with The Goblins we just have to let them use the stream.”
- Drogath encourages, “Show them your abs!” The abs are glistening.
- Korarath clangs a shovel and crowbar together to make some loud applause.
- The town slowly breaks out of their stupor and begin tending to Haru and Korarath’s wounds.
- Korarath takes the key to the city from Haru and hands it to Nathanael, who uses it to unlock Yhipp, Yhapp, and Yhupp’s cage.
- Doodledip imparts the children with a parting gift, a green goddess sandwich from Panera.
- Drogath has a Cannon Camera picture taken of all of them together.